Being off sick has a few advantages. I can catch up on the various US TV series I have recorded and never watched, get abused online by gamers when I attempt to take on the call of duty big guns and revise for my upcoming Sergeants exam. Or not, as is my case.
There is no excuse for not revising. I have the books, the online access and more importantly the time. It's an ideal opportunity, one that I probably won't have for a while. The fact I am writing this blog post just goes to show I am lacking commitment in this area. I have just over a week to the exam and still have (in no particular order) general police duties, evidence & procedure & traffic law to master. I'm quite happy with crime. The very thought of revising sends my blood pressure boiling and I simply switch off to the idea of reading books. My better half reckons I'm suffering from depression. She may be right, I'm no doctor but I guess the signs are there. I'm an irritable, horrible b*stard, hell bent on p*ssing everybody else off apparently. She's probably got a point.
The fact is that I've been stuck indoors for two months with just the odd excursion outside. The first month I was pretty much spaced out on pain and meds. The 2nd month I started to feel sorry for myself and became resentful of what I've done. I've lost out on a number of jobs whilst laid up and all this discontent with paycuts is doing my head in. I've become a royal, miserable pain in the a**. Over the last few days I've bitched at the kids, had a number of domestics with the other half and continued with my general grumpiness. However, I have woken today with a renewed vigour to stop being such a twat. The sun is shining, my health is improving and I haven't watched the news yet. I have also decided NOT to do the exam. This has lifted an enormous weight off my shoulders.
Some would say this is me wimping out, that I should be more focussed. They may be right, but I know one thing ~ my stress levels and the home life of my family come before any job, particularly one that seems to be so devalued by the government and media lately.
To be honest I don't have the 'Mens Rea' for it right now.
-- Post From My iPhone
Wasting More Police Time
2 days ago
I know how you feel, 5 weeks not being able to walk far or drive drove me mad, then even worse I got used to it! I'm back at work now which, inspite of the fact there are the usual politics I'm pleased about. I'm a real believer that you have to do whats right for you at the time, you can always redo the exam and if you're the same force as me then theres no promotion until after the Olympics anyway so is it any loss?
ReplyDeleteI think you have to badger your friends to take you out, its staying in that closes your world up and makes you miserable.